Saturday, December 18, 2010

Something Worth Saying

As a writer, poet, romantic - words and feelings resonate in my heart and mind. It has been stirred in my that going through painful trials gives me something to say, I have something to offer. The scars and process of healing somehow makes me more whole. God is stripping and burning all things in me that fail to reflect Him. When all this is done, I will have something worth saying.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Monday, November 8, 2010

An Addendum to Separation of Church and State

I started off with one point and rabbit trailed to another; my intial point of my post was to say that patriotism and faith in Jesus Christ cannot be made equal or enmeshed, neither can full separation of church and state be possible without just making politics a religion.

Instead, as Christians we must pray for our country, leaders, and military; we need to ask God for wisdom and discernment about the character of people and the Truth behind the laws when it comes time to vote. We must ask God to help us not be swayed by the tide of popularity or the cloud of confusion in the media; instead we must be quiet and listen to the Word of the Lord.

Patriotism is important. We are a part of this nation, and blood was shed for us to enjoy the freedoms we now posses. Christians should not abandon patriotism to say that America has now lost God's favor. God is graceful and long suffering; we must pray that God will raise up those who Love Him and follow His Ways.

We must also be careful in teaching about America's founding principles and purposes that we do not distort Christianity to be somehow enmeshed with patriotism. America was founded on Godly principles, and God began a good work in our country, but our country is run by a flawed humanity, many of which do not even claim to serve the God we Trust.

Check out the sermon by Pastor Gene Mills on Resetting our Values at http://www.celebrationchurchtx.com/, select watch sermons, and check out 10/24/2010.

Saturday, October 30, 2010

More on Friendship

Pastor Lori has this to say about friendship:

Here are five questions to ask yourself about friendships:

1. Is it hurting my relationship with God?
2. Is it distracting me from my call or purpose?
3. Is it destructive to the work of the Lord?
4. Is it helpful to my marriage or family?
5. Is it going to take away from the network of relationships God has given me?

God designed each of us for a purpose and he gave us friends to encourage us in that purpose. Who are you surrounding yourself with?

Surround yourself with people who are more interested in you becoming what God wants you to be than they are with their personal desires for your time and their plans for your friendship. I want to be the right kind of friend to the relationships God has given me. I want everyone I touch to be challenged to serve God and His House with greater love and passion - to be the World-Changers God designed us to be!

I think this last part is really the pivotal point...in this time people are so transactionally minded that they tend to see others as an asset or investment to be utilized for their purposes. I am looking for friendship where our greatest desire is to see the other person fulfill the plans God has for them. I can say that I am truly blessed to have a few of those friends, and although it is a rarity that we get to spend time together, the richness and rest of this friendships is incomparable.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Friendships

Lately I have been thinking a good deal about what makes my healthy and thriving friendships different from those that cause anxiety and tension. Pastor Joe (Celebration Church, see blogs I follow list) reminded us of the parable of the ten virgins going out to wait for the bridegroom in Matthew 25 and it really struck a chord on this thought process.

Matthew 25
The Parable of the Ten Virgins
1"At that time the kingdom of heaven will be like ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom. 2Five of them were foolish and five were wise. 3The foolish ones took their lamps but did not take any oil with them. 4The wise, however, took oil in jars along with their lamps. 5The bridegroom was a long time in coming, and they all became drowsy and fell asleep.
6"At midnight the cry rang out: 'Here's the bridegroom! Come out to meet him!'

7"Then all the virgins woke up and trimmed their lamps. 8The foolish ones said to the wise, 'Give us some of your oil; our lamps are going out.'

9" 'No,' they replied, 'there may not be enough for both us and you. Instead, go to those who sell oil and buy some for yourselves.'

10"But while they were on their way to buy the oil, the bridegroom arrived. The virgins who were ready went in with him to the wedding banquet. And the door was shut.

11"Later the others also came. 'Sir! Sir!' they said. 'Open the door for us!'

12"But he replied, 'I tell you the truth, I don't know you.'

13"Therefore keep watch, because you do not know the day or the hour.


The five wise virgins did not give away their oil, but guarded it and protected it so that their light would not go out. Proverbs 4:23 says:

Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.

But these are not easy things to do - we are supposed to be kind to everyone and available to everyone all day long - just a phone call, text, email, facebook message, tweet, etc away.

The thing that separates the healthy friendships from unhealthy is that my healthy friendships do not try to draw from my stores of oil - they guard and protect their own oil. It is safe, we bask in one another's light, we motivate one another to shine brighter and longer while awaiting our King, but we do not try to dip into one another's stores. Unhealthy friendships are taking what I have already decided in my heart to give, the areas where my cup runneth over, and have demanded more and more. They are never satisfied, constantly wanting more, demanding more of me until I am frustrated and all burnt out.

It occured to me that healthy friendships are not aggressive and rarely violate one another's boundaries except for the very rare moments when one needs to be pulled back from the brink, but even then, healthy friends yank them back, point them to Jesus, and become accountabilty partners - not the source. Healthy friendships do not steal from one another, but just bask in the overflow of one another, and they flow back and forth. We must protect our oil, our hearts, our wellspring from attack in some ways, and I find it challenging at times to manage this balance - it seems that I am always floating a little to far one way or the other. We must also learn to accept gifts freely given, and learn to discern those given with strings attached so that we may have wisdom to keep from bondage. Again, an area of revelation in my life, but still an area that I need help bringing to fruition.

Just a few more thoughts to marinate over...

Good night dear hearts...I wish you Godly discernment and the wisdom to know what to do with it.

xo's~Kandi

Friday, July 9, 2010

Mama Always Said...

"Those who are least loveable need love the most." Man I hated it when she said that!

Today I shared a troubling stituation with a friend. I shared the pain of the experience, the relief of freedom, and the constant burden of the emotional turmoil and wondering whether or not I behaved poorly. She told me that it just sounds like this person is hurting and unhappy, and it felt that suddenly that wall of anger that I had built came crumbling down. I understand - she is unhappy, unhappy with her life, her relationships, her career, and herself; all she has is to control others impressions of her to feel that at least others think she has it together. And my very presence threatened that because I called her on it. Only a truly unhappy person would act so, and that breaks my heart. I wish that I could have helped her, but someone people don't want help or to change, they just fight to stay in control of what they can.

All this to say, it is much easier to forgive and let go when you realize that hurting people hurt people. Dear Lord I pray that you provide her the safety of relationships who will allow her the love and grace to change, that she will be known and loved for her true self. And oh Lord I pray that for me also, for friends that will hold me accountable and lovingly call me out when I need it. You are graceful Father, thank you for a word well spoken.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Perception


In all my communication classes we have talked a million times about perception - I can now easilly switch back and forth between the picture of the young woman and the old lady. Both are equally true, real, there for all to see if they choose to dig. After this being ingrained in my head a million times, I am still stunned at how two people can converse and completely miss the point of the other's communication - they are discussing two totally different pictures.

Monday, May 17, 2010

She grew up slow...

"She grew up on the side of the road
where the church bells ring,
and strong love grows.
She grew up good;
she grew up slow,
like American honey."

These words from Lady Antebellum's song, "American Honey" keep playing through my head as I think of the recent video of the little girls dancing to Beyonce's "Single Ladies". It breaks my heart - Beyonce had an incredible video with a great dance, but these precious little girls add provactive moves with lingerie. Oh slow down, dear hearts.
Or Miley Cyrus' new video to "Can't Be Changed" - it is creative, but oh sweet Miley, you are so young, don't sexualize yourself, take your time honey. You are a treasure. It breaks my heart! Where is the brave man and nurturing woman that are intended to stand between a young heart and the world. Where are these girls' protectors?
Moms and Dads, don't wait until it is too late, stand in for them now. Lay yourself on the ground between them and the enemy. Do not give in or give up, be brave, be bold.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

The Lord is My Vindicator

After having my name thrown through the mud, and the value of my word tossed into the wind it is easy to try to vindicate myself. Gossip is so tempting. Just a bit of word vomit has instant gratification, but leaves me with a stomach ache later. I have really fought the urge, and a few times had to repent. I have prayed for my enemy, prayed that their heart would be transformed and they be used to further the kingdom. I prayed that God would reveal to me any truth in the character attack made toward me, and he has humbled me.
But today, oh glorious day – today I heard the beginnings of the Lord’s vindication. Today I discovered hard and fast evidence, testimony from lips other than mine, and I in no way caused this. The Lord is my vindicator. The Lord is my vindicator. Oh Father, help me not to destroy your blessing by poisoning it with my mouth. It is so tempting to gossip or make snide remarks, but I will not. The Lord will bring the truth to light!

Friday, February 26, 2010

Daddies

It is amazing how God places people in your life to teach you about His character. So often Scott teaches me new faces of the God I thought I knew so well. He is an incredible man, and I love watching him with our Laurelei. How truly beautiful watching their relationship blossom; I watch as Laurelei tries to steal his attention and then runs away looking behind for him to come after her. She squeals with delight as he chases her and then scoops her up into his arms. Even now, she is learning that her warrior will chase her and run to her, he will protect her, he will be there in her time of need, and how sweet to see a strong man be so tender. Scott's warrior heart, pursuing the heart of our precious Laurelei, protecting her as a delicate flower, yet seeing the fierceness that lies within - my dear husband, made in the image of our Most High God. Thank you Lord for this precious reflection of how you Love, Pursue, and Protect us.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Temporary Home

This was my temporary home, not where I belong,
just windows and rooms, that I was passing through.
It's just another stop on the way to where I'm going,
and I'm not afraid because I know
This is my temporary home.

It's a done deal - I'll miss that place. So many memories that still whisper to me from across those floors and along the land. So, so many memories...